United Nations of Beer

Blackrock homebrew beer

by Jimmy Weasel
(NSW, Australia)

Blackrock homebrew beer (pale ale)

Thinking about the first brew brings a nostalgic burn back up my throat. This brew is perhaps ubiquitously known throughout homebrewing circles as a practice brew.

The expectations are as mixed as they are high. And the anticipation is dangerously frustrating, as the realisation of a six-week wait is at your fingertips to find out whether you'll be a success or a drunken failure.

Take heart -- the difference between a good brew and a bad one is about two and a half longnecks.

The first brew is also a great way to get a feel for how homebrew will treat a man. The style of drunkenness can only be described as "a creeper", as you don't notice the effects of the first few.

Perhaps thoughts are elsewhere (perhaps about how brilliant one is for making beer in one's bathtub).

As the night (or morning in some circumstances) slips on, the steady metamorphosis into a total sot completes unbeknownst to the inebriate, who will only notice the slow effect when his words are mixed up, misused, malapropped or dangerously spoonered. Beyond this point, there is little hope.

It has been observed (and quite probably proven) that the hangover with Blackrock homebrew beer will be less intense than spending the evening drinking a similar amount of a commercial beer. This may be due to the lack of crap added to the homebrew. Apart from sugar, water, yeast and some sticky molasses stuff, there's not much else.

So Blackrock Pale Ale is a great brew to start on. It's moderately cheap, and you won't feel like a dumbass for wasting money when you screw it up.

It is a little like a few of the commercial pale ales out there, but this brew #1 was a little watery, as there was an error in interpreting instructions for "fill to 21 litres" as "add 21 litres".

This meant that the first brew ended up tasting like a Cooper's Mild (the orange one); Beer + water. It wasn't bad. Just thin. Brew #1 had less clouds and floaty shit than Coopers.

*If your brew is too watery, let it sit a few more weeks. The last bottle of brew #1 was far greater than the first.

In short, if you're thinking about trying a homebrew experiment, DO IT! It'll be fun and you'll get toasted on the cheap.