Guinness Mirror: Rectangle
by Tom
(Salem, MA)
Guinness Mirror: Rectangle
(Amazon)
One of the many items in our Guinness Store
There are two problems that I find with ordinary mirrors.
The first is that they force me to reflect on the dark void of swirling evil that lurks just behind my eyes, leaving me no choice but to confront the black, pustulant ooze of my disfigured soul.
The other is that they are no help in reminding me what beer I am drinking.
There is nothing that can be done to help with the first issue, but this handsome Guinness Mirror: Rectangle
Come to think of it, Guinness also reminds me of the dark monster lurking within me, always threatening to escape and wreak havoc upon the world. The last time I lost control of it was in Prague, back in the early 90s... But I digress.
This mirror can also be used to detect vampires at your next gathering. If any of your guests are not reflected in the mirror, quickly douse them with a pint of Guinness; not many people know that Guinness is traditionally brewed with holy water and a generous pinch of garlic, due to the infestation of vampires that plagued Dublin in the late 19th century.
There you have it: an item that combines form and function in a way not seen since a young Chris Evert first took the tennis world by storm.
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