Mountain Crest
by Kokanee Man
(Camrose, AB, Canada)
Mountain Crest: Canadian owned + American Made = Abomination to Beer
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I'm sorry, but Mountain Crest (aka Mountain Piss) is the worst beer I have ever had to drink in my entire life. It was, sadly the first beer I ever purchased due to its unbelievably low price.
Unfortunately, I was stuck with 30 beers that even my friends (destitute college students) refused to drink. I pounded back six in a row on a Friday and almost puked my guts up.
The reason Mountain Crest is so cheap is because it is owned by Calgarian Entrepreneurs who brew it in the United States to save money, then import it to Canada and sell it as a cheap alternative to good beer. Their slogan "Damn Good Beer" is a legal form of libel as far as I'm concerned.
The only way to drink this abomination is through large, desperate chugs that make you wanna crawl under your bed and die. We had begun to call it deer piss because I swear to god it tasted like it (It didn't smell like it though...). But this does!
(Editor's note: Meh, I'm not going to go there...)
If your ultimate goal is to get drunk then drink a bottle of malt liquor; it tastes a little worse, but at least you won't have to drink as much.
For a few dollars more invest in Pilsener, Kokanee, Molson Canadian, Labatt Blue, Miller... even the sacrilegious Budweiser is better than this Mountain Piss, I mean Mountain Crest.
If all else fails and you have six in your fridge, use them to dare your buddy to do something stupid and get him to shotgun them, then laugh as he coughs on the awful taste of Mountain Crest.
Bottom Line: Try it once, because you will NEVER buy it again. That's not a threat, it's a promise.
